VHP reveals Obama was born a Hindu and demands his ‘Ghar-Vapasi’

In a stunning new revelation that shocked the world, VHP President Praveen Tagodiaya published documents that revealed Barack Obama was actually Hindu by birth, and demanded that a ‘Ghar-Vapasi’ ceremony be held for him immediately after the Republic day celebrations.

“As you can see from this birth certificate and other documents, Barrack Obama was born as Bharat Abhirama right here in Meerut to a Hindu family. He was later adopted by an American family and they changed his name to Barrack Obama. Look, here are his adoption papers,” said Togadiya in a televised announcement.

“We are now very clear that Obama is a Hindu, and demand that the Modi government  allow us to organise a Ghar Vapasi ceremony to welcome the President back to his Hindu roots,” added Sudarshan Chakra, Secretary of the VHP.

The Congress immediately issued a statement saying that the documents presented by the VHP were forged.

“This is a conspiracy by communal forces to destroy the excellent relationships between America and India. We do hope that the secular forces of this country will unite against this unprecedented threat to national unity,” said Rahul Gandhi , as he emerged out of 10, Janpath, with his trademark grin.

The Whitehouse, which had planned for Obama to wear a dhoti and kurta at the Republic Day parade, immediately shelved the idea.

“We did originally want him to be in a dhoti and kurta,” said a Whitehouse official to the PMO. “But with the recent allegations, we do not want him to be seen in indigenous clothes as it may lead to more speculation about his Hindu origins. Instead, he has decided to wear a native African outfit with full headgear to prove his real ancestry.”

Mamta Bannerjee meanwhile wanted all patriotic Indians to boycott the Republic Day celebrations because the TMC had proof that the Ghar Vapasi programme had the blessings of the BJP.

“Our first request is that you should not attend the Republic Day parade. But even if you do attend the celebrations, see if you can go and slap a prominent person from any other political party,” she said. “I mean – why should my nephew be the only person to be slapped in public?”

The PMO later issued a  hastily worded statement saying that the Ghar Vapasi programme had nothing to do either with the PM or the BJP.

“Obama is Obama is Obama,” thundered Nirmala Seetharaman on national TV. “Let us not get side-tracked by all this acrimonious debate. The entire nation has tolerated Rahul Gandhi’s trademark grin for so long, why should we care what religion Obama belongs to? We will welcome Barrackbhai to India as he is.”

The Whitehouse issued a stern statement of protocol immediately to the PMO saying in no uncertain terms that Barrack Obama should under no circumstance be addressed as ‘Barrackbhai’, as it was a serious breach of diplomatic etiquette.